Waking up from a dream

Shortly after our decision to move out-of-state, we found the perfect place to build a house. It was down in a secluded canyon, no neighbors and had a great view of the Bear River and the mountains. 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, a den, living and family rooms, an outdoor kitchen with an amazing view of the river, a huge garden, a horse, two rabbits, 15 chickens, 2 lizards, 2 cats, three dogs, and an orchard later we had our dream home. Everything we had always wanted.

Our first year in the house Dan bought me a peach tree for our anniversary and planted it right outside the kitchen window so I could watch the blossoms come and go every spring, listen to the birds and hope for fruit every fall. The very next year it produced a couple handfuls of small peaches. So I made a pie for my family.  My peach tree is now taller than me. It’s big and bushy and full of peaches. It looks like it will be its best year yet.

There comes a time when you have to make decisions. Responsible decisions based on reality and some times that reality comes crashing down on your dreams. We have recently decided to sell our home. There are many reasons we are selling our home, but the ones I’m thinking about today are personal and physical. I can’t physically take care of a house this size anymore. Of course Dan helps, family helps, and friends help too, but it’s just too much. Plus having only one income, since I am unable to work and can’t start school (doc’s orders), make it a struggle to maintain the lifestyle we are in.  Add to that my developing asthma and allergies that left me sitting around with no energy more often than I liked this summer. Having only one lung that works really puts a squeeze on the breathing when you have asthma and allergies. Besides, who wants to live in a big, empty house? We have kids in college and only one at home now. We both knew this day was coming. It will relieve a lot of stress to simplify and reduce the things in our life that we can control. Then we can be as prepared for the things we can’t control as possible. We have to responsibly face the fact that my health is not the best and will only progress as life goes on. Not doomsday, just being real. We are planning for our future so the transition will be easier. But the future is coming faster than I planned.

A strong windstorm came thru the canyon this summer. My tree was really bending in the wind. Dan heard a crack and went to the kitchen window. My tree lay broken on the ground. It snapped in half! The big, bushy, peach filled top was now gone. It just couldn’t take all the pressure from the strong, blowing wind. I cried for a week over that tree.

Broken

When I finally got the courage to go and look at the damage and clean up the mess, I discovered that there were 4 small wilted branches just below the break. I grabbed a saw and smoothed up the damage. Sprayed on some pruning sealer, gave it some water and headed to the house with a hopeful heart.  For the rest of  the summer and into fall, I watched it through my kitchen window.  The tree began to slowly come back to life. And it was beginning to grow again. The birds came back too.  And maybe next year it will produce some fruit.

Growing again

Well, the “For Sale” sign is in the front yard by the road. I’m sad, but also very excited for a new adventure……..and a smaller home to clean.  Possibly by next fall, despite the economy and God willing, our house will have sold. Maybe someone will be baking a peach pie for their family.

Sometimes life is strange. It doesn’t always turn out the way we wanted. Dreams come and go. Sometimes we are broken and sometimes it seems to all go to hell. But I’ve been to hell and back again. I know the way, and if I let it, the journey will make me stronger because of it. I will continue to grow wherever I am planted. Even though life doesn’t follow the plans you made, If you stop and look around,you still end up in a really cool place after all.

~ by gonefishindd5 on October 17, 2011.

4 Responses to “Waking up from a dream”

  1. Diane you really are an inspiration. Thank you for posting this today just when I needed it. Your blog has affected my life in a profound way. Keep posting and keep up that amazing ever growing faith!! God Bless you and your family with the upcoming changes!! Have a glorious day!! Love, Abby

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    • Abby, I thought I replied to this earlier but I can’t find it. I’m sorry. So, I will do it now. I’m so glad I inspire you. Thank you for reading my post. I’m amazed at how it affects people to share my story. But you are the strong one Abby. You have had many trials in life and you are getting thru them with grace and lots of faith. YOU have been the one who has grown where you were planted, no matter what you were going thru. You are an amazing mother, friend, sister, woman and wife and I pray for you daily and I always have. Keep up the good work! Love always! Diane

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  2. Oh Diane, what a beautiful post and what vision you have. You carefully and thoughtfully look at the past and look realistically and lovingly toward the future. It takes a strong person to do those things. I am excited for you and the new adventures you have to look forward to with Dan and your kids. Love to you, laura

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    • Thank you Laura! For some reason our family is just meant to move all over and experience all kinds of cool places and new neighbors. But this place will always hold a special place in my heart. Remember “your room”? We will move “your room” with us and it will always be ready for you when ever you visit, wherever we are! I love you friend!

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