Coping with Strategies
Just wanted to pass this along. For those of you who follow my blog, the Christmas party’s have gone well this year. I didn’t say a single word during any speeches this year! Victory! LOL! I rest a lot during the day before the party and I have a plan. Dan give’s me certain ‘looks’ if I start to stray and then I just change the subject. Strategies are so important.
Brain Injury, Behavioral Challenges, and the Holidays Carolyn Rocchio, BrainLine
Ever since his TBI, my husband is sometimes a little inappropriate with his jokes and conversations. I can tell others feel embarrassed. And frankly, I’m embarrassed, too. How do I deal with this, especially with the added pressure of holiday gatherings?
The holidays can definitely come with more stress and more social challenges. As you probably know, when the part of the brain that controls a person’s ability to self-monitor and inhibit inappropriate behavior is damaged, it can lead to difficulty managing social interactions. Your husband may also lack the ability to use feedback, such as reading other people’s facial expressions.
Rehearsing or role playing before attending a party or holiday gathering can be helpful. Practice some cueing strategies to use if your husband starts to say or do something that could become embarrassing to you or others. For example, you could use a gesture such as a raised palm to alert him to stop.
It also helps to discuss, well in advance, what your expectations are and act out a scene you might encounter. For example, New Year’s Eve parties can be fun, but they usually include alcohol and the expectation of a midnight kiss. You may want to rehearse your husband’s response if he’s offered a cocktail — “No, thank you. Since I was injured, I’m using medications that don’t mix with alcohol.” As for the midnight kiss, explaining and rehearsing proper etiquette before the party will help, especially since other party guests may be jovially hugging and kissing others. Unless he fully realizes that it is customary to kiss and be kissed “like a friend” on New Year’s Eve, he may take offense. Rehearsal and reminders during the evening will hopefully lead to a Happy New Year.
our headbangers ball 